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Green Mark Vodka

Green Mark Vodka

Proof: 80
Color: clear
Nose: citrus and mineral
Taste: neutral
Finish: warm and viscous
Value: incredibly remarkable

Ah, vodka.  Why am I forced to review you?  If you do your job correctly, I won’t taste you at all.

And Green Mark Vodka, you do your job well.

Very well.

Apparently, Green Mark (aka Zelyonaya Marka) has been around since the 1920’s and Mother Russia has just gotten around to exporting it.  I have only one thing to say about that: shame on you, Russia!

Personally, I think vodkas really should come from Russia, Ukraine, or Poland. Jewel of Russia is my favorite vodka of all time.  But the very American Tito’s Handmade Vodka has been my cheap & cheerful, true-neutral, go-to vodka of late… until now.

You want the “Let’s Not Mince Words” quote?  Try this on for size:

Green Mark is the best vodka under $50.

You think that’s not a big deal, right?  Well, consider this: Green Mark sells for $10 to $12 a bottle.  It’s nearly tasteless, smoother than Tito’s, and $6 cheaper than Tito’s!

I’ll be honest, I had seriously low expectations for this stuff.  At its price point, I was expecting rubbing alcohol.  I was not expecting it to blow the doors off of Grey Goose, Belvedere, Chopin, Ketel One, even Hangar 1.

I know, I know, I *just* got done singing the praises of Hangar 1 and now I’m telling you a bottle of Green Mark… that costs $30 less… is better?  “Not possible!” you’re thinking.  Well, it’s possible.

I’ll be drinking Green Mark over ice, and if there wasn’t a warm full finish, I wouldn’t know when to stop.

I really can’t say much about Green Mark because it’s so neutral.  How can you describe something that’s not there?  I said at the top that the nose is citrusy and minerally.  Well, those are overstatements because there’s really not much nose at all.  Even at room temperature, this stuff is very neutral. If stored in the fridge, it’d be water.  Which is, of course, the whole point.

The viscous finish that I noted is just to let you know that it will coat the back of your tongue and your throat.  For me, this is a good thing.  I’ll be drinking Green Mark over ice, and if there wasn’t a warm full finish, I wouldn’t know when to stop.

I actually made Moscow Mule’s with Green Mark, and they were, by far, the best I’ve ever made.  I just can’t sing this vodka’s praises enough.

Any vodka cocktail you plan on making will be elevated by using Green Mark.  Period.

The Moscow Mule, starring Green Mark Vodka

The Moscow Mule, starring Green Mark Vodka

The Beverage Tasting Institute has recently given Green Mark a rating of 94 out of 100.  They called it “a remarkably pure, smooth and balanced vodka.” Me?  Well…

This is the fourth, and hopefully the LAST truly remarkable vodka that I’ll taste.  I’m seriously running out of superlative adjectives here.  This is an amazing vodka at an incredible price.

Final Rating: 95 out of 100